You know those
people who are struggling to see "light at the end of the tunnel" or
do not know which way forward?
Perhaps you
recognize yourself in this situation.
It is true that
certain problems and events are painful, complex, and dramatic and they are not
always the result of our choices. Sometimes we undergo a trial without having
provoked. It is not your fault if you were laid off for economic reasons, it is
not your fault if you harassing you, if you violent, if you are still single,
if the international news is shocking and overwhelming ... true, we do not
control all events that affect us. In addition, sometimes they we
"fall" without warning and we have to "manage" the situation.
Then there are
those days when you get up "left foot" and, as if by magic, or
sorcery, or an unlucky star, a sign of destiny, all that you undertake that day
fair. You will have the impression that everything and everyone is bent on you,
everything is connected and everything seems to happen at the same time...
Your entourage is
the same as yesterday, the world is the same as yesterday, but everything falls
on you...
We all have
"good reasons" to feel overwhelmed. However, this state weighing
suggests that we are victims of external events.
"You do not
know my life or my problems," then one of the defensive thinking you might
hear.
Yes, it's true, we
do not know the problems of others as they live, we do not know the context in
which they are located: it's their map, their feelings, their emotions and they
are probably right: for them, it's unbearable!
Well then, you
must know others who seem to stay happy in any situation!
How is this
possible? Are they sincere or just a "front"?
Do they have a
secret? If they succeed them, is it possible for me?
What makes the
difference between a person "overwhelmed" repeatedly through life and
one that seems to benefit from it all and come out the winner of all
situations? Every little thing is enough to get them excited. Breathing or be
healthy and to live them enough! Yet fundamentally, the situations in which
they are often the same as yours! They too have their trials. They were just
like you, but there is a good chance they manage them differently and they give
them a different meaning.
So what is their
secret?
It is interesting
to do a little analysis on behavior and how they are created to become
unconscious habits. Take time to inventories your "mental strategies"
unconscious to be aware in order to understand what is happening and what can
be improved.
Our behavior, our
way of looking at various situations, interpret them are the result of a
multitude of processes and become unconscious habits.
We are not born
with these patterns: they are created over the years, in mimicry of force (our
parents, our spouse,), to rehearsals force. Our family, social, professional,
everything that touches us, contributing to the construction of our
perceptions, our character, our interpretations, our feelings, our emotions.
This is a result
of repetitions of thoughts, findings, actions in the same direction and
conclusions that our judgment and our unconscious habits form our own 'strategy
of thinking. "We have all, without exception, developed various
"strategies" for this or that situation that will guide emotions,
choices, and behaviors. We have a sort of "automatic mode" to respond
to situations.
Is it possible to
control our states of mind and if so, how?
The state in which
you find yourself will inevitably influence your decisions and feelings. Some
states or emotions are fertile while others will be crippling.
Not convinced?
Make a small
demonstration:
Suppose for a
moment a situation "X" (take a position that suits you best) and
review the reaction you get when you are in a state of anxiety, and then repeat
the same exercise for the same position by imagining yourself in the following
states, do it, you see, it is essential to understand and integrate this
principle!
Enjoy this
experience as a small piece of internal drama, just for you.
Take this
situation and, as a theatrical game, how would you react if you were:
- angry
- Have a sense of
injustice
- vexed
- Not sure (e) you
- Happy (see)
- enthusiastic
- Convinced that
there is a solution
- Sure (e) you
Every spirit will
guide a different behavior, generate a different decision, yet the situation is
the same!
Give meaning to
soothe events. The unknown or misunderstanding feed anxieties and destructive
emotions.
Find the path that
will give meaning to your surroundings, do not suffer, but decide to do
something else. Whether in thought, religion, spirituality, philosophy or
reading a book, put your positive and constructive beliefs into practice. Live
fully what you believe to the extent that it is the positive and constructive
course.
Another exercise
is to remember a past experience. Any provided it is linked to a strong
emotion.
Consider a
vacation, a release, a happy event, trauma, ...
If you close your
eyes and you focus, you will find that all the emotions at the time back as if
by magic, as if you were there! And yet you are no longer!
Well, you can do
the same for the good experiences and feed your state of mind or visualizing
your future life: how it will become because you are the master! You can appeal
to your emotions by a mental exercise: you choose to feed better or maintain
depression.
Playing in this
"piece of inner theater" gives you the ability to use various
representations and emotions on command!
You can edit your
performances to end the paralyzing mindsets and create new ones!
You are then
passed through the first step: know what you want to feel, or perform live.
Then the next step
is to act naturally. You do not want to stay in a state of reverie: your life
will not change and will remain a fairy tale. You must take steps which will
provide you the best opportunity to produce the desired effect.
Contrary to what
many believe, we are masters of our states of mind and not their slaves and
stun limiting. This already asked to believe and exercise, perseverance.
Initially, you will do things consciously, provoked. Continue consciously and
continue until it becomes an unconscious habit.
Happiness is a
state of mind! Think about it.
Inspire yourself
with examples of people who have come out of possible situations that always
seem to be happy regardless of their situation. Failures and misfortunes, there
are around us without having to search.
Change: it
requires will, effort, self-sacrifice, perseverance, and faith.
Finally, remember:
this is not because it is difficult that it is impossible ... Changing a habit
is always painful, but perseverance always pays!
No one is born
with a predisposition to failure. Anyone can succeed!
Your servant in
optimism,
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